My heart is sore pained within me, and the terrors of death are fallen upon me. Fearfulness and trembling are come upon me and horror hath overwhelmed me. And I said Oh that I had wings like a dove! for then I would fly away and be at rest. Lo then would I wander far off and remain in the wilderness. I would hasten my escape from the windy storm and tempest. Psalm 55:4-8
Yesterday we finished with the simple act of taking that first step and bowing before our Lord. I find that in light of this very serious crisis, connecting with God is so very awesome and comes at times naturally but I also find that it brings me to a point of needing to decide if all I am feeling and wrestling with is normal.
Sometimes what we experience, our response to terrible events IS normal and there is nothing wrong with it. Nothing needs to be dealt with internally. Events happen we respond. We go to the Lord deal with it, hopefully, share with those around us and it ends there. We live our lives and go through what is happening.
Sometimes though, what I have found in my own life is that the Lord is using my emotions and responses to show me that there are some areas that need addressing and some areas that need work. This is not fun but if God is revealing something to us it is always good to stop look and listen.
I will give you a specific example. I am a planner. I grew up out on Eatons Neck where we lost power all the time and had well water which meant when a storm came in we had better be prepared. No electricity meant no running water etc. Therefore I became good at preparing for emergencies. So this preparing for the unexpected combined with my type A personality and my control issues created someone who liked to always be ready for whatever came along and to be able to deal with it AND be in control. Then…..this terrible virus came along and God recently reminded me of something very, very important.
I am not in control of what happens around me. I can prepare and take action and do all those things, but ultimately if my trust is not in the Savior, I am going to falter. And to some extent I have. But God is so wonderful. He is showing me that the best place to put my security, the best place to put my trust is not in the things I can do, important as they may be.
Where I need to go and stay, is in the arms of the Savior. He is using this crisis to show me those areas in my life that need to change and He is the one who can affect the change.
He knows how long this crisis will last. He knows what we need and He promises to take care of us. As believers, no matter what happens we can know that what He says is true.
I leave you with two verses, promises from the one who loves us so deeply.
Psalm 56:13-For you have delivered me from death and my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before God in the light of life.
Philippians 1:6- Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.